Day 123: Paying it forward

unnamedI had my daily rituals.  I’d pick up my Starbucks on the way to work and prepare to settle into whatever came my way.  I used to keep lists of things I had…and wanted…to do, but as I climbed the corporate ladder, I quickly realized that my lists didn’t matter.  My job was to deal with whatever came my way.  Sure I still had lists, but I ended up carrying them around with me more than crossing things off.

Along with that daily ritual was catching up on the day’s news.  That included breezing through the local news, some national headlines, and news specific to the industry I worked in.  I read those things because I had to.

The articles I was truly interested in had nothing to do with world news or things I was working on…unless you count one of those things as “me”.  My daily line up of personal interest articles included The Daily Love, Elephant Journal, Yogi Times, Spirit Science, and Spirit Science and Metaphysics, among others.

Even of those, there would be days when I’d quickly skim over the articles or skip them all together….except for The Daily Love.  No matter how busy I was, I would always find time to read Mastin Kipp’s blog.  I felt like it spoke to me…directly to me.

I kept reading for a bit after I retired and then one day I realized that I was deleting more of the emails than I was reading.  Then I realized I a week had gone by…then two…and now I may read one or two a month.  The reason?

“I was looking for someone to inspire me, motivate me, support me, keep me focused…Someone who would love me, cherish me, make me happy and I realized that all along I was looking for myself.”

For so long I had been so busy…so distracted…that I didn’t have time…or the patience…to look within for guidance so I had to seek the inspiration externally.  Eventually enough of the words sunk in…I found the time to listen to my own inner voice…I stepped onto my own path.  Eventually, I began to realize that everything I’d read…everything I’d been searching for externally…actually existed within me.  No different than it does for you.

I’m so appreciative of all the writers and bloggers whose words carried me when I was too tired to lift myself up.  For their wisdom and stories.  For their rawness and truth.  Thank you for sharing your struggles and your lessons.

Thank you…thank you…thank you.  It’s your words and examples that allow me to be where I am today…attempting to do the same for others so that someday you don’t need…or want…to read my words either.  Someday, you’re voice is all you need.  Someday, you are helping someone with your words…and paying it forward.

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This entry was posted in dreams, emotions, energies, future, love, relationships, retirement, self, self exploration. Bookmark the permalink.

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